As a society we have certain norms and for the last 20 years since the movie the secret came out and everyone is grabbing onto invisible thinking in order to make money from from "the secret" It is a great business model seeing people ate selling invisible things with just a little bit of do this never do that coaching, books and online purchases of courses, pdf etc. The one main thing is be grateful for everything is out right toxic. Stop that shit!
We have the be grateful for everything crown just to be grateful for everything, well why?
There are horrible things that happen to people everyday and I don't think their first response should be gratitude.
What if their loved one died are you really going to say to that person to bypass thier grieving and pain from loss and move right to hey you should be grateful? I fucking hope not because that's toxic gratitude and you're an asshole for saying just be grateful!
We could make a huge list of what toxic gratitude looks like and is but the purpose of this post is to teach the right way to be grateful without being toxic.
If I get in an accident my first thought isn't to be grateful and say thanks for fucking up my car I appreciate you, it's like, fuck goddammit this sucks what a bitch!
So anger is definitely something that you should feel in situations where anger is appropriate.
The one thing I should add is if you're in a situation and you're angry and other people are involved just step back have a process I place to de-esecrate those emotions before you do or say something you regret that you might not be able to take back and can change your future forever. Lets count now 10, 9, 8, 7.... ohmmmm. keep breathing and think of a pink elephant smiling at you named rainbow telling you that they love you, aww how can you still be mad after that.
My point is even if the situation is complicated, complex and down right bullshit please take a minute and just step back for that state for your own good before you start lashing out and making horrible decisions, it is a proven fact that we drop 20 I.Q. points when we're under stress and anger is the something to the body so don't be a dumb ass.
So after you have processed those emotions and feelings be grateful for what you learned or how no one got hurt or that you're still alive. Try to be optimistic if you can. Some situations just don't deserve a positive spin because they're deplorable in everyday possible. You can still be grateful after the fact on all the thing that could of happened didn't!
Sometimes pian is going to be the focus and it is completely fine to feel any emotions. It is how you project those emotions that matter because no one deserves your bullshit just because you had a shit day or of a bad situation you're in. Just be respectful and If you need someone to talk to ask for that human interaction it's that simple.
Most things in life even the bad can add value to your existence and teach you something so look at it like that before you go off the deep end thinking it is the end of the world.
Acceptance is one the best ways to handle any situation because when you have Acceptance of what is going on you no longer have resistance and can start thinking clearly and process the feelings and emotions in a healthy way in order to .always sound decisions which in some cases could save your life!
When dealing with the death of a loved one first and foremost give yourself permission to grieve and feel that loss. At this point fuck gratitude because non of us should be practicing toxic gratitude for someone that died that you loved.
Feel the loss then celebrate their influence or the relationships that blossomed out of knowing that person just feel the love you had for them. After that if you're ready be grateful and give thanks.
Be grateful show gratitude but never be toxic gratitude!
Be Love,
Jimmy Peace
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